and so it begins...

To give you a few basics-- I am 26 years old, 4'11" and weigh around 265lbs.  I've managed to gain around 60+ lbs in the past two years.  That's about a five-year old child a year! This is my highest weight ever. I'm wearing a size 24, and the smallest size I've worn since 6th grade was a women's 14 (and then I remember my pants being tight!). 

Health, and a little bit of vanity have prompted me to seriously lose the weight.  In the past two years, I've had issues with recurring headaches, back pain, swelling feet and hands, joint pain, and fatigue. Recently, I've been working with an endocrinologist and I have an unofficial 

goal to lose about 120 lbs. 

That's about the size of the average chubby highschool cheerleader. I know it will take time, but more importantly it will take a LOT of changes.

My doctor, after taking enough blood to equal a sacrifical goat, determined that I am "insulin resistant" but not diabetic.  I'm grateful that insulin injections will not be in my future.  He said that the insulin resistance is most likely attributed to PCOS (poly-cystic ovarian syndrome) which I have a number of qualifying symptoms.  He put me on two medications and a strict diet.  I'll start off the first two weeks trying to maintain no more than 1500 calories a day.  Then I'll drop down and remain at a 1200 calorie a day intake.

This along with excercise should not be that complicated.  However, it's one thing to drastically change my meals and my daily routine--- it's something entirely different to change the Man's. 

He's supportive, but due to negative experiences before with his womenfolk dieting--I think he's a little apprehensive about me going whole-hog to not be such a porker (haha, punny). My biggest worry is that me making this change in my lifestyle could make our life together more difficult. I spent some time yesterday mapping out meals that wouldn't require too much extra prep to make them both Eva and Man friendly. We'll see...

So, today I finish my preparations which include:

• Cleaning out the kitchen cabinets
• Purging the freezer and fridge
• Setting up the scales (one to weigh me, the other for my food)
• Prep meals for the work week
• Do a little secondary grocery shopping for "low fat" rule-abiding food

I know this is a positive life-change for me, but I am super anxious about everything-- meeting my goals, keeping our grocery budget down, more work in my daily routine, failure, new medicines... I could go on.  I just hope I can tame my emotions a bit, get focused, and do what I need to do. 

Here's to the start of something good, which will become something great, and possibly even amazing.

Holy shit, I'm scared!